How to Make Yourself More Attractive




Being attractive is about much more than looks. It’s about presenting the best version of yourself in all aspects of your life. With self-improvement in critical areas, you can become more attractive to potential partners and have more self-confidence and happiness daily.

Physical Attractiveness

While physical attractiveness is not the only component of attractiveness, taking care of your physical appearance is still important. Here are some tips for enhancing your physical attractiveness.


  • Practice good hygiene – Bathe regularly, use deodorant, brush and floss your teeth, and trim your nails. Being clean and smelling good makes you instantly more attractive.
  • Style your hair – Get a flattering haircut and style it in a way that frames your face nicely. Use styling products if needed to keep your hair looking its best. Avoid styles that look messy or unkempt.
  • Shave/groom facial hair – Keep facial hair neatly trimmed for men. Patchy or scraggly beards or mustaches are unattractive.
  • Care for your skin – Keep skin clean and moisturized. Exfoliate to remove dead skin cells. Use sunscreen daily. Treat blemishes properly. Get facials occasionally for deep cleaning.
  • Whiten your teeth – Get professional teeth whitening if needed. Use whitening toothpaste and rinse daily. Avoid foods and drinks that stain teeth.
  • Wear flattering clothes – Dress in clothes that fit you properly and are appropriate for your age. Wear stylish, well-put-together outfits. Avoid overly revealing clothes.
  • Wear light makeup – Apply tasteful makeup to highlight your facial features for women. Conceal blemishes define eyes and lips. But don’t overdo it.
  • Exercise regularly – Stay active to maintain a toned, healthy physique. Focus on cardio and strength training.
  • Eat a healthy diet – Eat plenty of lean proteins, fruits and vegetables. Avoid processed foods. Stay hydrated. Don’t overeat.

Taking care of your grooming and physical appearance will make you look polished, put-together and attractive.

Posture and Body Language

How you hold yourself also impacts your attractiveness. Practice good posture and body language:

  • Stand up straight – Don’t slouch or slump your shoulders. Keep your chin up and look ahead.
  • Sit up straight – Don’t hunch over or slump down in chairs. Sit upright in a confident manner.
  • Smile and make eye contact – Smiling and maintaining eye contact shows confidence and friendliness.
  • Use open body language – Avoid crossing your arms or hunching inward. Keep arms/legs uncrossed.
  • Take up space – Don’t try to shrink away or take up as little room as possible. Feel free to spread out.
  • Move slowly – Avoid fidgeting or making sudden, quick movements. Move deliberately yet casually.
  • Mirror others – Subtly mimic the body language and facial expressions of those you interact with.

Carrying yourself with good posture and open body language projects self-assurance and approachability, which are very attractive qualities.

Attractive Personality and Attitude

Physical attractiveness alone will only take you so far. Developing an attractive personality and attitude is essential for meaningful relationships. Here’s how:

Be Confident

  • Value yourself – Believe you are worthy and deserve to be loved. Don’t put yourself down.
  • Take healthy risks – Put yourself out there socially, and don’t be stopped by fear of failure. Take social risks.
  • Overcome insecurities – Identify negative thought patterns that undermine your self-esteem and work to change them.
  • Set ambitious goals – Dream big and challenge yourself to achieve things that seem out of reach. Accomplishing goals builds confidence.
  • Accept compliments – Don’t deflect or minimize compliments. Allow yourself to appreciate them.
  • Maintain good posture – Carry yourself in a way that projects confidence, even if you don’t feel it.
  • Speak clearly – Mumble less. Project your voice. Vocal confidence also builds confidence in general.

Exuding confidence, even on the inside, will make you more attractive to others and boost your overall happiness.

Be Passionate

  • Pursue interests – Have hobbies, skills, or causes that excite you. Being passionate keeps life interesting.
  • Share passions – Don’t keep interests private. Express them so others can share in your enthusiasm.
  • Try new things – Step outside your comfort zone to grow and have exciting new experiences to talk about.
  • Find work you enjoy – A meaningful job will keep you motivated. Passion for work is attractive.
  • Use expressive language – Describe things vividly and with enthusiasm. A passionate conversational style is magnetic.
  • Be playful – Allow yourself to be silly, adventurous and have fun. Playfulness is disarming and charming.
  • Follow dreams – Keep sight of bigger life dreams and take steps to achieve them. The pursuit is attractive.

When you live passionately, you shine. An authentic zest for life is lovely.

Be Kind

  • Ask questions – Show interest in learning about others by asking thoughtful questions.
  • Actively listen – Give people your full attention when they speak and avoid interrupting them.
  • Give compliments – Offer sincere praise about qualities or achievements you admire in someone.
  • Volunteer – Donate your time to help worthwhile causes and people in need.
  • Practice empathy – Strive to understand what others are feeling and communicate that understanding.
  • Respect differences – Don’t judge people for having lifestyles, beliefs, or preferences different from yours.
  • Be dependable – Keep your promises. Make sure to cancel plans on time. Being reliable shows you care.
  • Use good manners – Make people comfortable by being polite, tactful, and considerate.
  • Be generous – Share your time, resources, and energy with others. Generosity and selflessness are incredibly charming.

Showing kindness in your interactions makes people feel valued. A caring nature is an extremely attractive quality.

Be Positive

  • Smile and laugh – Take life lightly. Approach each day with a sense of humor. Levity is appealing.
  • Use positive language – Avoid complaining, criticizing, or using negative phrases. It drags you down.
  • Compliment others – Praise people for their accomplishments and attributes. Positivity is contagious.
  • Point out silver linings – When bad things happen, focus the conversation on the things that are still good.
  • Have a hopeful vision – Believe things can improve. Envision positive scenarios for the future.
  • Forgive mistakes – Don’t hold grudges against yourself or others. Allow fresh starts.
  • Express gratitude – Appreciate life’s gifts, both big and small. Thank the people who have helped you.
  • Embrace change – View change as healthy and necessary for growth, even when it’s scary. Flexibility is resilience.

Staying positive demonstrates inner strength and stability. People are drawn to those who can stay upbeat despite life’s challenges.

Social and Emotional Intelligence

Sharpening your social and emotional skills will make interacting with you more rewarding for others. Here’s how to improve these intelligences:

Develop Social Intelligence

  • Learn from mentors – Spend time with those who navigate social situations well and model their behavior.
  • Observe social dynamics – Pay attention to how people interact and the unspoken signals they use. Learn from observation.
  • Improve your small talk – Practice keeping conversations flowing smoothly, without awkward pauses.
  • Avoid social faux pas – Notice what behaviors make people uncomfortable, and don’t do those things!
  • Learn to tell stories – Share exciting anecdotes from your life. Storytelling is socially captivating.
  • Get comfortable with public speaking – Build confidence speaking in front of groups. It’s a valuable social skill.
  • Turn acquaintances into friends – Nurture casual relationships by deepening conversations and making plans.

Being socially intelligent allows you to engage with others in a charming, authentic way that puts people at ease.

Develop Emotional Intelligence

  • Notice your feelings – Don’t ignore emotions. Accept them as information to understand yourself better.
  • Name your emotions – Learn to identify subtle differences between emotions to express them more articulately.
  • Express feelings constructively – Avoid suppressing emotions, but prevent emotional outbursts. Communicate feelings productively.
  • Understand others’ emotions – Observe emotional cues in conversations to perceive how others are feeling.
  • Regulate your emotions – Develop techniques to self-soothe heightened emotions and defuse negative moods. Don’t act out.
  • Empathize with others – Imagine yourself in someone else’s situation to understand their perspective and emotions.
  • Forgive easily – Let go of grudges or resentment toward those who have hurt you emotionally.

Handling emotions skillfully demonstrates maturity. Being able to understand and communicate feelings attracts potential partners seeking meaningful connections.

Financial Responsibility

While money doesn’t buy happiness, managing money wisely is essential for achieving life goals and creating security and stability. Demonstrating financial responsibility can increase attractiveness.

Live Within Your Means

  • Track spending – Use a budgeting app to monitor your monthly spending and see where money is going. Avoid excess.
  • Reduce expenses – Cut cable packages, downsize housing, and wear clothes longer between replacements. Small cuts add up.
  • Save Automatically – Set up automatic transfers to put a portion of each paycheck into savings. Out of sight, out of mind.
  • Pay with cash – For discretionary purchases, pay in cash. The physical act makes you more mindful.
  • Pay down debts – Methodically pay off credit card balances and student loans. Their interest negates savings.
  • Negotiate better deals – Don’t accept standard fees. Call companies to request discounts or lower rates.
  • Delay gratification – Resist impulse buys. Wait 24 hours before purchases. Separate wants from needs.

Making prudent financial choices today allows exciting possibilities for the future. Good money management demonstrates responsibility and maturity. Both are incredibly appealing.

Work Toward Financial Goals

  • Define objectives – Write specific long-term and short-term financial goals with target amounts and dates.
  • Make a plan – Outline measurable steps needed to reach each goal and schedule them on a calendar.
  • Start retirement funding – Contribute the max to your 401K or IRA, even if retirement feels far away. Time allows growth.
  • Develop diverse income streams – Start a side business or build investment portfolios. Multiple income sources provide security.
  • Increase your value – Take courses and acquire skills to earn promotions and merit higher pay.
  • Save for large purchases – Choose experience goals like vacations and material goals like home ownership. Save accordingly.
  • Protect assets – Purchase adequate insurance for your needs. Insulate yourself from catastrophic loss.

Pursuing career and financial goals breeds confidence. Seeing dreams become reality is deeply fulfilling. Shared goals form strong bonds between partners.

Mental Stimulation and Growth

Relationships thrive when both people actively enrich their minds and expand their perspectives. Avoid stagnating. Here’s how to keep growing:

Continue Learning

  • Read books – Include fiction for emotional intelligence and non-fiction to learn new concepts. Stretch your perspectives.
  • Take classes – Formal courses keep the mind engaged. Classes also present social opportunities with like-minded people.
  • Listen to podcasts – Make drive time educational by playing podcasts on topics you want to learn about.
  • Get cultured – Attend lectures, theater performances, art shows, and other cultural events that inspire and stimulate new thoughts.
  • Travel – Experiencing new places and cultures widens your worldview and provides endless learning.
  • Have intellectual conversations – Discuss thought-provoking topics with friends and coworkers. Debate respectfully.
  • Question assumptions – Be open to changing deep-seated beliefs if new information indicates they were misguided. Evolve.

An active, ever-expanding intellect comes across as both wise and youthful. Minds stay sharper when continually challenged and enriched.

Discuss Values and Beliefs

  • Articulate priorities – Define principles most important to you so you can thoughtfully align actions with values.
  • Consider the bigger picture – Contemplate how your values fit into the larger human story. Seek truth.
  • Question superficial assumptions – Don’t automatically adopt beliefs just because they are widely accepted. Go deeper.
  • Practice critical thinking – Objectively analyze all sides of complex issues. Resist knee-jerk reactions.
  • Entertain opposing views – Engage respectfully with those having divergent political or religious beliefs. Disagree with civility.
  • Admit what you don’t know – Accept there are many mysteries. Curiosity leads to growth. Blind certainty stunts it.
  • Evolve beliefs – Be willing to change perspectives when new information gives you greater wisdom. Growth comes from flexibility.

Examining your core values and beliefs leads to powerful personal growth. A robust system of values is attractive.

Service and Contribution

Caring about making the world a little bit better through your actions creates meaning and helps relationships progress beyond surface levels.


  • Pick causes you to care about – Tutoring kids, serving meals, cleaning parks, whatever matters to you. Follow your heart.
  • Make it a habit – Set a monthly or weekly volunteer schedule like you’d schedule other essential priorities.
  • Volunteer as a couple – Sharing in service work strengthens bonds. You see each other’s caring nature.
  • Teach others – Share your passions and talents by leading a class or workshop for others to learn from you.
  • Mentor someone – Provide ongoing guidance and encouragement to help another succeed.
  • Join a service club – Surround yourself with other big-hearted people. Great friendships form.
  • Include your kids – Demonstrate selflessness by bringing children along for age-appropriate volunteer work. Lead by example.

The satisfaction that comes from helping others keeps life meaningful. A spirit of service also makes you glow with goodness.

Practice Sustainability

  • Conserve resources – Reduce the use of plastics, gas, electricity and water in your home to preserve the planet.
  • Buy local – Support businesses in your community to strengthen the local economy. Fork over the extra bucks.
  • Buy responsibly – Research companies behind your products to ensure ethical business practices.
  • Reduce waste – Commit to producing less trash by reusing items, repairing instead of replacing, recycling, and composting food scraps.
  • Get in nature – Spend time enjoying and protecting natural spaces. Our mental health depends on it.
  • Eat less meat – Reduce consumption of meat and dairy products, given their environmental impacts.
  • Use green transportation – Walk, bike and public transport as much as possible. Fly less.

Living sustainably protects the world for future generations. We all benefit from those who take steps to preserve resources and connections to nature.

Shared Interests and Experiences

Remember to consider the value of simply sharing enjoyable experiences and activities. Bonds deepen when you explore common interests together.

Try New Things Together

  • Take a class – Cooking, dance, art, or whatever piques your interests. Shared discovery is bonding.
  • Start a hobby – Hike a trail, learn guitar, join a book club. Seeing each other enjoy something new brings you closer.
  • Plan adventures – Go rock climbing, learn to sail, and explore a new city. Experiencing firsts together builds powerful memories.
  • Make things – Build furniture, knit scarves, assemble a model. Constructive activities provide fixer-upper satisfaction.
  • Play games – Try chess, ping pong, board games, or trivia. A little friendly competition brings out playfulness.
  • Cook together – Find challenging recipes and make an evening out of tackling them together as a team.

Sharing new experiences creates vulnerability, which strengthens mutual understanding and affection. You see new dimensions of each other.

Enjoy Meaningful Conversation

  • Ask good questions – Inquire about each other’s histories, opinions, dreams and quirks. Every detail offers insight.
  • Debate respectfully – Discuss controversial issues while remaining civil. Explore differences and find common ground.
  • Share wisdom – Tell stories from your life. Discuss lessons learned. Swap meaningful quotes.
  • Brainstorm together – Collaborate on vision boards, bucket list ideas, business ventures, and home renovations. Dream big.

The best moments happen when you take time to dive into real conversation. Few things bond two people more profoundly.

In Conclusion

As you can see, becoming more attractive is about working on all aspects of yourself – physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual. Strive to be the best version of yourself and live joyfully. Share your gifts with the world. Growth leads to confidence. Confidence leads to attractiveness. By continually improving yourself, you’ll create the opportunity for excellent relationships, strong social connections, and greater life satisfaction. Make the journey fun, and enjoy yourself along the way.


mandy b.
mandy b.
Founder, owner, writer & (coming up this summer)
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